29 July 2011

Coffee Cup Browsing

Oops, indeed.  That Conservative Republican Presbyterian terrorist-wannabe they arrested yesterday has ties to several lefty anti-war groups.  So, if being a "right-wing Christian" causes one to turn to mass murder, then does being a lefty anti-war activist cause one to turn to treason and terrorism?

Soon-to-be GOP presidential candidate, Rick Perry says that abortion is a states' rights issue.  No, governor, it's a human rights issue.  Without the right to life, no other human right matters.

Hollywood has run out of ideas. . .they're making the board game, Battleship into a movie.  Will I go see it?  Aliens?  Check.  Explosions?  Check.  Exploding aliens?  Check.  You betcha!

Best First Sentence of an Essay Evah!  "It is a truth universally acknowledged that it is only a short road that leads from grammatical laxity to cannibalism."

The Curt Jester speculates on the nature of purgatory for Catholic bloggers.  There's a bone-chilling possibility for Yours Truly.  Shudder.

Yes, we do.

This cartoon says just about everything that needs to be said about The Won.

Follow HancAquam & Check out my Wish List --------->

28 July 2011

Coffee Cup Browsing (Late Edition)

FLASH!  Conservative Republican Presbyterian solider arrested for plotting a terror attack on Ft. Hood.  He had a copy of the Westminster Confession and Ann Coulter's latest book in his trunk.

Is the Norway Nazi a "fundamentalist Christian"?   In his own manifesto he says that he is NOT a practicing Christian.

Lefty theologian uses the Norway massacre as an opportunity to score points against her ideological enemies.  Shameful. . .and predictable.

Oh, if only women and married people could be Buddhist monks!  Wait. . .

Another dogmatic plank in the Church of Global Warming's mythology goes bust.  Anyone still believe that AGW isn't an elitist power-grab?

No. 3 Dem in Congress says that school desegregation was accomplished by executive order.  Um, I believe the Supreme Court ordered that.  History has never been a politicians' best friend.

Someone bit down too hard on Sr. Mary Dominic of the Five Wounds of Christ's communion host, but Melvin loves sister's hosts (unconsecrated, of course).

Cheeky neighbors and their guns

Cute pic of the day

Here's the feline version of me at 2.00pm when I'm in Rome. . .

PING!!!

Follow HancAquam & Check out my Wish List --------->

What does one do in a poetry workshop? (Updated)

A couple of HancAquam readers have written to ask what does one do in a creative writing workshop. Well, we spend most of our time reading and critiquing student poems. When we aren't doing that, we read and critique published poems. In this summer's workshop, we are focusing on contemporary poetry published in the U.S. and the U.K. We spend one day a week writing in class using exercise I've cobbled together. Here are a few examples:


Epigraph Exercise

Choose one of the quotations below as your epigraph:

“What do you love better: the ruin or its repair?” – Eric Pankey, “Prayer”

“Repetition is the death of art.” – Robin Green

“Painting is silent poetry, and poetry is painting that speaks.” – Plutarch

“Earth, is it not this that you want: to rise/invisibly in us? – Is that not your dream,/to be invisible, one day?” – R.M. Rilke, “Ninth Elegy”
“The woman wants a salad.” --Ange Mlinko, “A Few Leaves of Salted Rocket”

Compose a twelve-line free verse poem that argues against the idea/sentiment presented in the epigraph.

No form of “to be” may be used.

You must include the phrases: “ducks and oranges” and “beats me” in the poem.

Each line MUST be exactly eight syllables.


Junk Drawer Exercise

You are looking for a rubber band.

In your kitchen junk drawer you find the following:

a can opener
a box of staples
a screwdriver
several broken pencils & dried pens
a watch w/o a wrist band
two used tubes of Chapstick
a handful of coins
a bottle of baby aspirin
two Christmas cards from 1983
a plastic spoon
several packets of soy sauce
a couple of crumpled receipts from WalMart
a seed catalog
five keys on New Orleans Saints keyring
a pocket-sized bottle of bug spray

Choose nine of these items and compose a free verse poem consisting of seven couplets.

You need the rubber band to save your life.


Not-guilty Confession Exercise

In a prose poem of no fewer than 75 words, confess to a crime you did not commit. You may not mention your innocence; however, it must be clear that you are innocent.

Give specific details of the crime—details that only the criminal would know.

Include the penalty for the crime and how you intend to deal with it.

You are confessing to your “victim” or the victim's family/friends.



Missing Persons Exercise

Media sources all over the world are reporting that individuals seem to be randomly disappearing.

Not only are these people disappearing physically but memories of them are fading as well.

Choose five of these people and compose a twenty-line elegy for them.

Include enough detail to distinguish them from all the other individuals who have disappeared.


Questions in Heaven Exercise

After a long and happy life as an award-winning poet, you die in your sleep and arrive at the Pearly Gates.

St. Peter greets you with the following request, “You've lived a long and happy life as an award-winning poet. The Angelic Host needs your help. The questionnaire we use for admission into Heaven has become a bit outdated. Would you compose a list of questions for us that tests a soul's grasp of Truth, Goodness, and Beauty?”

St. Peter needs no fewer than eight questions that never mention Truth, Goodness, or Beauty nor do they hint at their true purpose.

The questions may not refer in any way to religious/spiritual concepts or use language that might betray their religious/spiritual nature.

The idea is to ask recently separated souls questions that only indirectly test their humanity.


Antique Store Exercise

While on a road trip to __________ you come across an antique store called Noah's Next Ark.

You stop for a bathroom break and decide to explore the store.

Compose a longish (20+ lines) poem about what you find in the store.

While exploring the store, you discover that you have been killed in an auto accident.

What do the things in the store teach you about the nature of chance?

NB.  My students did not like this last exercise at all.  They said it sounded like the plot of a cheesy movie!

Follow HancAquam & Check out my Wish List --------->

25 July 2011

Albertus, Aristotle,Thomas, Immanuel in one Poem!

Theories of the Soul

By Karen An-hwei Lee
 
 A true friend is one soul in two bodies. 
—Aristotle
 
Kant says, transcendental
 idealism. In Aquinas,

we exist apart from bodies
    but only on Thursdays

when his famous ox
    flies by the window

wiser at Cologne
    where Albertus Magnus,

his real name, appoints
    Aquinas to magister studentium,

master of students. Aquinas
    is petrified but says yes [. . .]
 
 
Click here for the rest of the poem!

24 July 2011

Coffee Cup Browsing

The number one killer of black Americans?  Planned Parenthood.

Outrage in the Media!!!  Catholic bishops call on media to give less airtime to Catholic heretics/dissidents.  Well, there would be media outrage about this story if it were about Catholic bishops. 

Lesbian couple sues B&B for refusing them a "wedding" reception.  Well, why not?  SSM is really all about persecuting/prosecuting Christian dissent from the LGBT(XYZ) political agenda.  NB.  the B&B owners are "devout Catholics."

Oakland parish rebels against their new pastor and bishop. . .apparently, the previous pastor was something of a Great Progressive Leader who turned the parish into a personality cult.

Archbishop Chaput:  "In the years ahead, we’re going to see more and more attempts by civil authority to interfere in the life of believing communities."

Pray for the people of Norway. . .

A handy history of the political terms "Left" and "Right."  The US Left is trying to tell us that the whacko in Norway is "a right-wing conservative" or "a fundamentalist Christian."  In fact, he's a nationalist, a Nazi. 

Norway's strict gun control laws didn't help matters:  ". . .the killer had the only gun on the island."
Thus demonstrating that when guns are outlawed, only outlaws have guns.

11 y.o.'s answer some questions about science. . .

Follow HancAquam & Check out my Wish List --------->

22 July 2011

Bruised, Stretched, & Picked Clean

Mary Magdalene
Fr. Philip Neri Powell, OP
St Albert the Great Priory

If I were to ask you to name the opposite of “being anxious,” you might say “being calm.” Given a little more time to think about it, you might add “peaceful,” “relaxed.” Or you could get theological and say “being faithful,” “trusting.” Mary Magdalene gives us another possibility: being obedient, listening to and acting on the Word of the Lord. Our not-yet-ascended Lord tells Mary to go the disciples and announce that he is going to the Father. In her fervor, she first announces, “I have seen the Lord!” Then, John tells us, she “reported what he told her.” Mary's anxiety over the apparent disappearance of Jesus' body from his tomb is transformed into. . .something else. Is it peace? Relaxation? Trust? How about ecstasy? Mary becomes ecstatic when she reports on her encounter with the Risen Lord. Despite popular images of the ecstatic saint, spiritual union with the divine is not always pleasant. The American poet, Charles Wright, captures both the pain and the purification of ecstasy when he writes: “I want to be bruised by God./I want to be strung up in a strong light and singled out./I want to be stretched, like music wrung from a dropped seed.” Why does he long for this divine interrogation? He says, “I want to be. . .picked clean.” The disciple and the poet both reveal a difficult truth about following Christ: when we announce that we have seen the Lord, when we report on all that he has told us, we will be bruised, stretched, strung up, singled out, and picked clean. 

After Mary makes her ecstatic announcement to the other disciples and reports on all that Jesus told her, the Lord's former students huddle together in fear behind locked doors. They are blasphemers and traitors wanted by both the temple and the empire. It's not until the Christ has ascended and the Holy Spirit is sent that they are given a voice to preach. And once that voice is given, they break their fear and anxiety and flood into the streets, preaching and teaching, speaking in the tongues of those who will listen. And as they bear witness to the mercy and love of the Father over the years, they are stretched, bruised, singled out, and eventually picked clean. They are stripped to the bare bones of their trust in God, announcing as they die, “I have seen the Lord!” 

How will we be bruised and stretched? Probably not in the same way that the disciples were. The obstacles we face in preaching the gospel are similar in nature but different in technique; that is, we face the same kind of worldly obstinacy as the disciples did but the stubbornness we face has a new language, a new game-plan; we face the same kind of idolatry of power, wealth, prestige but all these have adopted new guises, new rules. What hasn't changed is the saving message of God's mercy and love, the simple, straightforward declaration of God's forgiveness and His eternal welcome into His family. When Mary Magdalene shouts out, “I have seen the Lord!” she announces to the world the Father's will that all His children return to Him through His risen and ascended Son. When we repeat her apostolic message, we risk the bruises that all prophets and preachers risk when they speak the truth. Maybe not the firing squad or a prison term but we risk surrendering control, anxiety, willfulness. We risk everything when we take on the commission of living the gospel and telling others about the wonders of divine mercy. The purification of ecstasy is worth the pain it inflicts if we can say, in the end, “I have seen the Lord!” 

Follow HancAquam & Check out my Wish List --------->

20 July 2011

Grazie, grazie. . .

Just a quick note to say Mille Grazie for the recent activity on the Wish List!

Every book helps keep me current in all thing philosophical, poetical, and theological. . .

God bless, Fr. Philip Neri, OP

Follow HancAquam & Check out my Wish List --------->

19 July 2011

Commenters at NCR: "joyless people with no hope"?

Methinks that horrible screeching might be the "Spirit of Vatican Two" being exorcised from the Church. . .

IF you have any doubts at all about whether or not the Holy Father's appointment of Archbishop Chaput to Philly is Good Thing. . .read the comments on this article from N.C.R. (Nasty Cynical Rag, as we called it in seminary).  

Here are a few of my favs from the Exemplars of Catholic Tolerance and Diversity:

"The very worst man for the job in Philadelphia. He will bring more of the same, as in cover-ups and evasion. This man has inflicted more damage on priests and lay people in the past decade that we should not be in the least surprised that Ratzinger (Benedict), would select someone such as this to carry on the right wing agenda of the restorationist movement."

"The Vatican and B16 are only carrying out their plan: Wreck the church. Hope any mature Catholic will leave in disgust. Afterwards, hunker down behind the Vatican walls, with all the gold in the coffers, maybe in a century or two everyone will have forgotten what a mess the hierarchs have made of the church."

"The Church just plunges itself deeper and deeper into the abyss. . ."

"The poor people of Philadelphia. They are getting someone with a heart of stone for a leader of their Church. If they're smart, the parishioners will keep their money in their pockets and let that do the talking."

"Heaven help us! Apparently the thinking in Rome was that the problem with Philadelphia was that its bishop wasn't Republican enough."

"He did all the damage he could in Denver. Let him move on to Philadelphia to spread his narrow minded conservatism. And get that red hat ready."

"Now the people of Philadelphia are being punished for the sins, incompetence and arrogance of Rigali.  How long before this archdiocese becomes the home of the ever-diminishing numbers of the "faithful remnant" in a "smaller, purer" church?  Maybe that's what Chaput promised B16 - weed 'em out and gimme a red hat.  Shame, shame, shame."

[NB.  Almost all of these hysterical rants were answered on the site by someone. . .]

Here are a few comments from Archbishop's interview at N.C.R.

"This is just another case of one following another. The entire Church should demand Benedict 16's resignation along with Rigali's.  Not one red penny for the American Church or the Vatican until these bungling autocrats are gone."

"This appointment is such a crass act from a pope who has been a bungler in so many areas of church life. It's another example of what happens when the episcopate becomes little more than a pawn on a papal chessboard and very little more than that."

"An interview chock full of self-serving statements from another papal pet. . .Hats off to the Chinese who are standing up to Rome in much the same way as the English did in the sixteenth century!"

"Benny 16s days should be over too. A nice house in Sardinia, Sicily, or a jail cell at The Hague could be his great opportunity to reflect on the blunders of his papacy (the Unholy Triumvirate of Ratzinger, Sodano, and Bertone) and to do penance for the damage these old autocrats have brought upon the Church."

On the commenters themselves, one brave soul notes, "I'm convinced that the NCR comments section is probably them most negative, unconstructively cynical corner on the whole Internet. Talk about a joyless people with no hope. . ."

Follow HancAquam & Check out my Wish List --------->

Chaput to Philly!

Just announced on the Vatican's website:

 Il Santo Padre Benedetto XVI ha accettato la rinuncia al governo pastorale dell’arcidiocesi metropolitana di Philadelphia (U.S.A.), presentata dall’Em.mo Card. Justin F. Rigali, in conformità al can. 401 § 1 del Codice di Diritto Canonico.

Il Papa ha nominato Arcivescovo Metropolita di Philadelphia (U.S.A.) S.E. Mons. Charles J. Chaput, O.F.M. Cap., finora Arcivescovo di Denver.

+ 

The Holy Father Benedict XVI accepted the resignation from the ministry of the Archdiocese of Philadelphia Metro (USA), presented by His Em. Cardinal Justin F. Rigali, in accordance with can. 401 § 1 of the Code of Canon Law.

The Pope appointed Archbishop of Philadelphia (USA) Archbishop Charles J. Chaput, O.F.M. Cap, currently Archbishop of Denver.


Follow HancAquam & Check out my Wish List --------->

18 July 2011

Coffee Cup Browsing

Bureaucratic leeches:  between 1975 and 2008, the number of faculty in the CA university system rose by 3.5%.  In the same period, the number of university bureaucrats rose by 221%.  That's where your tuition money is going.  

Anti-Palin meme of the day:  "Undefeated" opens in Orange Co. to an empty theater.  What you don't know--unless you read the fine print--is that the reviewer attended an unadvertised midnight showing on a Thursday. Oh, and there were six people in the theater. 

Director of "Captain America" drops anti-American rhetoric when it becomes clear that his politics are hurting the bottom-line.  He must be one of the "Michael Moore Marxists." 

B.O. charged with war crimes. . .accused of murdering Osama ben Laden.  NB.  B.O. and his globalist ideologues L.U.V. international law, socialist-Euro-judges, etc.  So, I expect B.O. to submit himself for arrest and prosecution forthwith.

Union bullying manual is made public.  Yes, I mean the actual manual published by SEIU.

Jewish publications lauding efforts of the Holy Father to rescue Jews from the Nazis. . .in 1939.



Ahhhhh. . .cute pic of the day.

Follow HancAquam & Check out my Wish List --------->

16 July 2011

OP Laity Retreat

Every summer I offer a day-long retreat for the Dallas-area Dominican laity.  And every summer, we have a great time!

This summer, the topic of the retreat will be:  “'Putting Out into the Deep'":  Catholic Laity and the New Evangelization." 

The retreat is open is all. . .come join us!

Follow HancAquam & Check out my Wish List --------->

Coffee Cup Browsing (Humor Edition)

I'm tired of lying politicians; self-absorbed celebrities; impotent dictators (foreign & domestic); and zombie-idolaters. . .so, I give you COFFEE CUP BROWSING:  THE ALL-HUMOR EDITION!!!

Venn diagram of my sense of humor.  Yes, I am constantly in trouble b/c of my sense of humor. 

Self-appointed Plate Monitor is "concerned" about your weight.  MYODB!

Like the Park Ranger said, "I don't have to outrun the bear. . .I just have to outrun you!"

Organizing for maximum efficiency!

If your fav font were a dog. . .

Creative wedding cakes.  #19 is my fav.

Ahhhh. . .breakfast in bed.

Learning math in Catholic school.

Follow HancAquam & Check out my Wish List --------->

15 July 2011

When "diversity" becomes a religion. . .

This is why you should send your kids to a small, Catholic lib arts college like the University of Dallas:

UC-San Diego is gutting several academic programs b/c of budget shortfalls.  Almost every department in the university is getting some sort of cut.

The only sacrosanct area?  "Diversity" programs/bureaucracies.

While slashing real academic programs and productive faculty, UCSD will add yet another "diversity" wonk to an already massively bloated P.C. bureaucracy:  ". . .the Chancellor’s Diversity Office, the associate vice chancellor for faculty equity, the assistant vice chancellor for diversity, the faculty equity advisors, the graduate diversity coordinators, the staff diversity liaison, the undergraduate student diversity liaison, the graduate student diversity liaison, the chief diversity officer, the director of development for diversity initiatives, the Office of Academic Diversity and Equal Opportunity, the Committee on Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation Issues, the Committee on the Status of Women, the Campus Council on Climate, Culture and Inclusion, the Diversity Council, and the directors of the Cross-Cultural Center, the Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Resource Center, and the Women’s Center."

It's a religion.  Send your kids to a Catholic university.

Follow HancAquam & Check out my Wish List --------->

Mercy not sacrifice

St. Bonaventure
Fr. Philip Neri Powell, OP
St. Albert the Great Priory

Like the sniping political operatives that they are, the Pharisees attack Jesus and his merry band for violating the Sabbath Law. Their crime? Some of the disciples absentmindedly pick grains of wheat and snack on them during a lesson. When the Pharisees pounce, Jesus—ever the scholar of Jewish history and the scriptures—remind them that David and his friends went into the temple and ate the bread of offering. Then he lowers the boom: “If you knew what this meant, I desire mercy, not sacrifice, you would not have condemned these innocent men.” This is a triple accusation. The Pharisees do not know their own history. They do not understand mercy or sacrifice. And they have condemned innocent men. Of course, their most egregious error is their failure to recognize Jesus as the promised Messiah. Had they done so, they would have known that the Son of Man is Lord of the Sabbath, thus making their condemnation of the disciples into a chance to show mercy. So, what does this scene tell us about the relationship btw mercy and sacrifice?

We might be inclined to conclude that the two are opposed. Jesus says that he prefers one to the other, therefore, we can either show mercy or offer sacrifice. The Law requires sacrifice, while Christ requires mercy. The two are incompatible. But this can't be right since Christ is the fulfillment of the Law. In the City of God, Augustine clears it all up for us. When Jesus quotes Hosea, “I desire mercy, not sacrifice,” Augustine writes, “. . .nothing else is meant than that one sacrifice is preferred to another. . .mercy is the true sacrifice. . .All the divine ordinances. . . concerning the sacrifices in the service of the tabernacle or the temple, we are to refer to the love of God and our neighbor” (X.5). In other words, every act of mercy is a sacrifice, an embodiment of the love God has for us and a demonstration that we love Him in turn. To set aside judgment and condemnation in favor of mercy is the sacrifice God desires from us. 

What might be confusing here is that we seem to be using the term “sacrifice” in two different senses. When Jesus says, “I desire mercy, not sacrifice,” he uses “sacrifice” to mean “the ritualistic slaughter of an animal in the temple by a priest according to the Law.” This is not the sort of sacrifice the Lord desires. Augustine gives the term “sacrifice” its contemporary meaning in the context of Christ's fulfillment of the ritual Law of animal slaughter. That is, he goes to the root of the word and discovers that sacrifice is what we do when we love the sinner and show him/her mercy. For Augustine, following Christ, without love, the sacrificing priest is just a butcher and his sacrifice is just killing. What makes “showing mercy” a sacrifice is our giving up on the prideful need to sit in the Lord's place as judge and executioner of His justice. When we show mercy to a sinner, we first acknowledge our own sinfulness and confess the need to be forgiven. None of this means that we're to be “soft on sin” or make a habit of excusing disobedience! It means just the opposite. Only a sinner needs mercy. Only a sinner can be called to repentance. 

Jesus tells the Pharisees that they are in the presence of something greater than the temple, something more fundamental, more vital than the Law. They are in the presence of Love Himself, mercy-made-flesh. Had they acknowledged this truth, their desire for sacrifice would have turned to pleas for mercy. And their accusations to songs of praise.

Follow HancAquam & Check out my Wish List --------->

Coffee Cup Browsing

A Pastafarian (follower of the Flying Spaghetti Monster) wins the right to wear "religious headgear" in his DL photo.  The gear?  A colander.   LOL!

Mark Shea:  ". . . gay 'marriage' is prelude to legal persecution of the Church for teaching what it teaches about sexuality."  Yup.  Just a matter of time and right Nanny State judge.

Pop-atheist/Brit Blowhard Dickie Dawkins is rendered of his self-important fat and his bones are ground to dust. . .couldn't have happened to a more deserving fellow.  (NB.  the language of this article isn't "family friendly.")

Tiresome clerical dinosaurs in Austria throw a hissy-fit.  Basically, they are whining that the Church isn't Protestant.  Fortunately for them, there are lots of Prot communities for them to join!

Catholics Doing Bad Right for Centuries:  "Even our sissypants wonk patsies are hardcore."

"Friend" vs. "Best Friend"

I want this to be the cover art on my first collection of poems. . .

For all my fellow Grammar Nazis out there. . .